My first day of Kindergarten (as an empty nester)

I’ve never regretted only having two children. My husband and I felt blessed and complete with two healthy babies, and to be honest . . . I’m not one to look back. I certainly didn’t miss the newborn stage. I highly regard my sleep and quickly came to terms that I would be an unpleasant mother if I had to get up with a third child. I rejoiced on family vacations when both kids were out of diapers and naptimes were history. So with my son in 3rd grade and my daughter venturing close to elementary school age, I was anxious to enter that next stage of my life.

As a work-at-home mom, I sometimes struggled with balancing the life of a stay-at-home mom and this tiny little thing I call a career. As lucky as I was to have the flexibility to attend the preschool Christmas party or to forgo lunch breaks to sit in carpool lines, I would end up working well into the evening in order to make my deadlines. On days when the kids stayed home sick from school, it was I who was soaring down the hall to answer my work line in between wiping noses & distributing Motrin.

So today, I had planned to “celebrate” my daughter’s first day of kindergarten. I was the mom who bragged at preschool graduation about how ready I was. How it will be “liberating” to finally have some quiet time to myself with uninterrupted workdays. It was I who thought the weeping moms at kindergarten orientation were crazy as they envisioned their child stepping onto the school bus.

I was not that mom. I so wanted to be the mom you see at Starbucks with her laptop in “grown up clothes”, drinking her mocha quietly in the corner. And all along, the seasoned moms who listened to me gloat, knew how I would really feel when the day arrived.

So when the moment finally came, it all seemed to go so quickly. With a snap of a picture and a blink of an eye, away she went. My tiny daughter. My 5-year-old. Driving away on that big yellow bus without apprehension. I stood silently and said a prayer that the (almost) complete stranger behind the wheel would get my babies to school safely. And as I walked back to my quiet house, a rush of thoughts came to me … how will she reach the paper towel dispenser in the bathroom? Who will be there to help her with her tray in the cafeteria? How will she ever get through 8 hours of school without a mommy hug? Why on earth did I rush this?

Yet, independent and ready to take on the world, I know she was clearly ready. And it suddenly hit me that maybe she was the only one.

Save The Drama For Your Mama

With each new trip down South Street heading toward The Raleigh Memorial Auditorium, I look forward to a new experience. For me, it is a memory-in-the-making with my family. For my daughter, it was the birth of a new love.

It was 2 years ago, this November, sitting in the dimly lit theatre, side-by-side with my daughter, when the true passion had taken hold. The love of the stage.

It was Annie. It was the perfectly choreographed dance of the orphans, performed out on hands and knees with sponges and buckets. It was the vibrant colors of the New York skyline set. It was the shrill of Ms. Hannigan’s laugh when she plotted against the children. And it was the last dance with Daddy Warbucks that had truly captivated the heart of my (then) 4-year-old. I noticed a little twinkle . . . an awakening of sorts that seemed to grow with each tap of the heel. I couldn’t be happier to experience that magical moment with her . . . right then and there.

You see, like any other 4-year-old, this little gal could rarely sit still for a 10-minute cartoon and typically found it imperative to see the inside of every restroom . . . in every restaurant . . . at every meal. Snacks were a must at any function over 30 minutes. But not this time. Not a peep. There were no snack requests or bathroom breaks in those 2 magical hours. Just pure passion for the excitement on the stage.

I remember when I, too, was captivated by Annie. Growing up in a rural area in Northern Michigan, theatre was hard to come by. However, Annie happened to visit a nearby town, and like myself, my mother jumped at the chance to take me. I sat in awe, imagining the life of these tiny actors and replaying “It’s A Hard Knock Life” over and over in my head for weeks.

Since seeing Annie, we have managed to make an appearance at a few other productions. It always amazes me to see what little things my daughter takes away from each performance. For example, in Wizard of Oz, she developed the love of the ruby red slipper. We may have walked down that Target isle, past those glistening, scarlet shoes 100 times before, but it wasn’t until she witnessed Dorothy herself, clicking those tiny heels, that she truly became enamored with the sequined red slippers.

And then there was Little House On The Prairie. For me, I was captivated Melissa Gilbert’s rendition of “Ma” in the show that I adored as a child. And the music . . . it brought me back to a time in my life . . . way before cell phones and the intranet. She, too, picked up on the simplicity of life. Things as simple as the tattered, homemade dresses and the uncomplicated lifestyle. Not to mention, she wanted braids in her hair (like Laura) for a week after the show!

I occasionally hear the phrase “Save The Drama For Your Mama” and I have to laugh because it means something a little different to me. It means to set aside the time to share the wonder and excitement of the drama of a stage production with my children. To open their eyes to another world or another time and place. And whether or not my daughter ever experiences the thrill of being cast as the lead role in any production, such as Annie, I will always remember the spark that Annie lit long ago as we sat marveling at the show playing out before us.

Do you have a special moment or tradition that you do while attending the theatre with your children? Please share it with me!

Stephanie is the founder of the witty motherhood blog, Southern Momentum, born right here in the Triangle, and the newest addition to CarolinaParent.com's bloggers. SoMo (for short) is a collaboration of sleep-deprived, Gen X gals who started out as friends and became grounded together in a wonderfully, challenging journey called motherhood … some Southern by birth and others, transplants, who fell in love with front porch swings and sweet tea.

Each Mom contributes her unique blend of witty, realistic approaches to life and is dedicated to sharing stories and short-cuts that shed light and laughs on surviving Motherhood and what it means to hit her stride. Throw in some Hollywood gossip, product favorites, and a few dirty little secrets and there you have it … a yummy, 100 percent guilt-free recipe for what it means to be a Mom and still be YOU.

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My first day of Kindergarten (as an empty nester)

Save The Drama For Your Mama